— 12 Steps to help you and your daughter through the wedding decorating process
— Focus: Tips for the mother of the bride helping her daughter plan the decorations for her wedding
So your daughter would like you to help do the decorations for her wedding… a task that has many elements to it. How do you manage this enormous project and stay sane? Whether you love to decorate, or find it challenging, having a basic checklist and a way of keeping organized will help the job of decorating for a wedding not seem so overwhelming.
Disclosure: Some of the links in this post are affiliate links, meaning, at no additional cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through and make a purchase.
Step 1 – Analyze what areas will need decorations and the time available
Each venue will have its own unique accommodations and needs. Make a list of all the areas that will need decorating. See the list below for ideas. It’s up to you whether you keep things simple or go fancy, but keep in mind how much time is available to set up and tear down the decorations. Will you be able to access the venue the day before? Or will you have to set up everything the morning of the wedding? How much time afterwards do you have to clean it all up?
Both my daughters got married at county parks, so we had to bring in all our own decorations, so we tried to keep things simple and easy to set up, yet beautiful and special. With my first daughter, we were able to rent the lodge for two days, so we could get everything set up the day before. With my second daughter, we could only have the lodge for one day, so we had to keep that in mind when planning the decorations since we had limited time to set them up in the morning. It took a lot of planning and people helping, but the results turned out beautifully.
COMMON WEDDING DECORATION NEEDS
- Bride’s bouquet
- Bridesmaid bouquets
- Corsages and boutonnieres
- Flowergirl flowers or petals
- Ring bearer pillow or sign
- Arch
- Unity ceremony table
- Altar
- Candelabras
- Fireplace
- Pews or chairs
- Window ledges
- Walls or posts
- Aisle
- Welcome sign
Looking for Wedding Ceremony Decor Recommendations?
- Head table or sweetheart table
- Chairs
- Centerpieces
- Place cards
- Favors
- Cake table
- Food serving tables
- Gift table and card box or basket
- Seating chart
- Guest book table
- Photo table
- Walls or ceiling
- Entrance
- Bathrooms
Looking for Wedding Reception Decor Recommendations?
Step 2 – Decide what your budget is for decorations
You and your daughter need to decide who is going to pay for what and what the budget limits are. With weddings it’s easy to throw caution to the wind and get into debt over your head. After all, it’s a once in a lifetime event, right? Yes, and it will be over in a flash and then you will have the bills to pay for a long time afterwards. Use some wisdom. It’s very possible to have a beautiful event without breaking the bank. When there are choices for less expensive options or simplifying things, consider choosing those. The average cost for wedding decorations is $1800, according to easyweddings.com. But it can be done for much less than that with some creativity and savviness.
Step 3 – Start gathering ideas for the decorations
A great way to gather ideas is to set up a Pinterest board and share it with your daughter. Then you can both start collecting ideas and sharing them. Pinterest is like a virtual bulletin board where you can add pins of ideas that you find on the web or on other Pinterest boards. You can set up different boards for each area you are planning to decorate to organize your ideas. I did this with my second daughter and it was very helpful. For a tutorial on how to set up Pinterest boards and share them, go to this link: How to Use Pinterest for Beginners
Step 4 – Clarify the theme of the wedding decorations
This is where communication with the bride is especially important. Questions to ask:
- What are the color of the bridesmaid dresses?
- What type and color flowers does she prefer?
- What seasonal elements does she want included?
- What themes go well with the venue?
- What is the bride’s style?
– Romantic or modern?
– Rustic or Bohemian?
My first daughter’s theme was winter and the colors were green and white with touches of pink. It was very easy to come up with decoration ideas for her wedding.
My second daughter’s theme was a bit eclectic. It was a summer wedding and she wanted blues and purples, so we went with hydrangeas. I would have been fine with all the decorations focused on those colors and flowers. Then she wanted to incorporate origami, since she and her husband both loved that art. So we added white origami birds hanging from the arch in the ceremony and various prints of blue, purple and green from branches for centerpieces, and origami place card holders. And since it was an outdoor wedding, we thought it would be cute to have paper pinwheels making an aisle leading to the ceremony area. So we made those out of various pastel prints. Then shortly before the wedding she and her fiance decided to get succulents for favors to put on the tables. My sense of unity was feeling off balance a bit, but I had to just let it go and remember that it’s her wedding, not mine. Her theme was “eclectic” and that fits her to a T. It was actually very cute and everyone enjoyed the unique decor.
Step 5 – Gather what you already have
Look around your home. What do you or your daughter already have that could be used for decorating at the wedding? Mason jars, vases, candles, teapots, silk flowers, flower pots, flowers from your garden, pinecones from your yard, origami paper, etc. Check your own stock first to see what’s available. Perhaps you have friends and family that you could borrow items from as well. Be sure to label or keep track in your notebook so things can be returned to their rightful owners after the wedding day.
Step 6 – Try out some ideas
Before you commit to making six bouquets or 12 centerpieces, just get enough supplies to make a sample. See how it looks in real life first and how easy or difficult it is to make. After you settle on the design, then you can invest in all the supplies. Unless you run across a great sale that you can’t pass up. Then you might want to go ahead and take the plunge.
I found it helpful to set up a card table, put a white tablecloth over it and do a practice centerpiece arrangement and table settings to approximate what it would look like at the receptions. We did the same thing for the sweetheart table.
Once you figure out how you want an arrangement to look, take a picture of it so it can be replicated at the venue.
Step 7 – Make your plan and shopping list
This is where a planning notebook comes in very handy. Once you and your daughter have decided what you want the decorations to be, you can use Pinterest or Trello or a binder to record your final choices, then make your shopping list.
- Pinterest – Make a new share board to hold only the Pins of the designs you and your daughter have chosen. https://blog.wedsites.com/use-pinterest-wedding-planning/
- Trello – Make a shared board and create lists for each area being decorated. Then make cards with photos or link to save the ideas you will be using. https://trello.com/teams/wedding-planning
- Binder – Can be used to save all your plans, checklists, and ideas. See my article on how to create your own here.
Michaels and Joanns are just two examples of great places where you can find wedding decoration supplies. Amazon also has many items available, and it’s convenient to be able to shop from the comfort of your home. You also may be able to find some deals at bridal swap sites where recently married brides sell the decorations they just used at their own wedding.
Step 8 – Organize your purchases and supplies
I recommend getting some clear storage bins to hold the decorations and separating them by area. Example: all the centerpieces in one bin, all the pew decorations in another bin, etc. Label each bin and include a direction sheet for what to do with the decorations contained within. That way, anyone in your set-up crew can help on the day of the wedding.
It’s also helpful to have a large shelf that can be dedicated to holding wedding decorations until the big day. We ended up just buying a new shelf. After the wedding, it was a great place to store garage sale items, and then it became a pantry shelf. You can always use another shelf!
Step 9 – Accept and recruit help
Some of your friends may enjoy helping you make wedding favors or assembling centerpieces or writing place cards. Once people hear you are planning a wedding, you will often get offers to help. Accept as many offers as you can! It takes a village to marry a daughter!
If no one offers to help, don’t be afraid to recruit some relatives or close friends. Not only can they help prepare things before the wedding, but if you are setting up your own wedding decorations, it’s crucial to have extra hands to help get everything in place on time. The wedding party can also help with this. In fact, in my opinion, it’s their job to help with anything on the wedding weekend! After all, they are called “bride’s maids” and “groom’s men” for a reason!
Decide if the bride and groom will be helping with the setup. With both my daughters, I didn’t want them to stress about the decoration setup. I wanted the wedding couple to be able to relax and get themselves ready. They had a lot of last minute details and packing to attend to. Plus, I wanted them to be able to walk in and be surprised with the transformation of the lodge we decorated. They both really appreciated it. But other brides might like to have a hand in the set up as a way to keep busy and keep away the jitters!
Step 10 – Make a set up plan
This is crucial in order to have everything run smoothly on the wedding day. If you have access to the venue the day before the wedding, that is ideal. You can do most of your set up ahead of time and be more relaxed on the wedding day.
Make a list of all the tasks that will need to be done during setup time, including what supplies will be needed. I recommend doing this in a shared Google document. (Click here for tips on how to use Google Docs for wedding planning.) If you share it with your daughter, then you will both be able to edit it. Then you will want to print it out and put it in a notebook to bring on the wedding setup day for easy reference.
I also found it helpful to write out the individual tasks on index cards to bring along. That way, whenever someone came up to me to ask what they could do next, I could just hand them a card with the directions on it, point them towards the supplies, then they were off and running.
Or if you don’t want to write out all these cards, you could have the volunteer take a picture on their phone of the instructions on your master list and go on their way to get it done. Then you mark on your master list who is taking care of what.
Consider printing out some photos of your practice setups for reference. That way others can replicate exactly how you wanted the centerpieces to look, or how the sweetheart decorations or fireplace decor should be arranged, etc.
Step 11 – Make a cleanup plan
We put so much work into making the wedding beautiful, that sometimes we forget that it all has to be packed up at the end of the day.
- Consider letting some of the guests take home the centerpieces.
- Can any of the decorations be disposable?
- Ask the wedding party to stay afterwards to help with the cleanup.
- You may want to recruit some relatives or friends as well.
- If you are setting up and cleaning up on the same day, you might want to have two different crews.
- Write down a cleanup plan. How do you want each item packed up or disposed of?
- Consider asking someone besides yourself to be in charge of the cleanup and give them the list. Perhaps someone in the wedding party. I found I was exhausted at the end of the day and just wanted to get off my feet.
Step 12 – Celebrate and recover
Hooray! You made it! You helped create a beautiful setting for your daughter’s wedding and it is forever captured in memories. You can go home and crash or take a nice long bath with some epsom salts and lavender essential oil. That’s my favorite way to unwind. 🙂
If this article has helped you, please share it on Pinterest, and feel free to add a comment below.
Disclosure: Some of the links in this post are affiliate links, meaning, at no additional cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through and make a purchase.
